An awakening...

Remember when you were a little kid? You used to have big dreams. You wanted to become a doctor, a rich businessman, a loving mother/father, a nurse, etc. We used to dream of what we'll be when we grow up. Now that we're all grown up, what happened to those dreams? Have you been so busy that you barely have time to start living your life? Always go back to how you were as a little kid, how that little boy/girl would react when (s)he sees you now. Will that little kid be proud or disappointed? It's never too late to change things. You're still alive, you can still make that little kid proud of you. When the sun is setting in your life, at least you can look back and say that you lived the life you wanted.

Every now and then we are reminded of this yet we brush it off and go on with our boring life. We let each day pass by and we still focus on things that don't really matter. We get so caught up on what's urgent and we forget on what's important. We work... We work every day and we spend very little time on what makes us feel alive. Say this to a kid and they won't understand why adults do that. Yes, we have obligations but seriously now... Obligations will never go away. Bills would keep on coming. When we're done saving up to get a car, we focus on getting a house then we complain about all the bills and all the obligations that goes with it. We just don't stop, do we? We are so hungry for so many things then we complain that it's stopping us from actually living.

"Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change." Here's a quote I really like because it's really true. Why don't we change our perception of life? Why don't we think about our life today, why we have this kind of life and why are we unhappy? Why say the glass is half empty when you can it's half full? Just think about it...

Obligations... It's not an excuse. Can you list down the number of things you wanted to do but never did? What's stopping you? Take time to just let go of all the hurdles that's in the way for you to actually enjoy the life you have. We are not in this world forever. This is just a place to prepare us for what comes next. It is also the time when we can enjoy being human... being a part of this planet. Why don't you take that chance and just jump... be free... Feel how the world can be so wonderful.

I am going to live my life. Thank You Lord for the big reminder.

Open letter for my daughter

My sweet little angel,

I hope one day you'd come across this post and read what your mom has to say for you. Right now you're a sweet young little darling at the age of 1 year and 9 months. Since the day I learned about you growing in my womb, you made your mommy's life so happy. I always wanted to meet you and now that you're here with us, words could not express just how much I love and care for you. Just like any mother would, I think about what's best for you first before I even think of myself. Your dad sometimes throw tantrums because he would jokingly say that since you came he no longer became a priority. Of course I love your dad but you have changed my life in such a way that I focus more on you because you need me the most. It really warms my heart every time you say "mommy, I love you" and every time you get angry when someone tries to hold me. You are so possessive of your mom because you only want to be my special one. I truly enjoy being with you and enjoying the sweet hugs and kisses from you and all the "I love yous" you'd say to me. You are my heaven, sweetheart and I want to be the best mom I can for you. I love you so much.

 My dearest sweetie, I hope you know that no matter what happens in the future remember that your mom loved you so much. Please don't even doubt that because I am willing to give my life for you when I am given the chance to once again. You see, mommy got sick because of my pregnancy that went wrong along the way. I knew something was not right but the doctors didn't quite get it but I held on because losing you is never an option. I held on and I knew you'd hold on too and I'm glad we made it 'til the end. We almost didn't, sweetheart. But we finished the race though I was bruised through our battle. Being a mother is tough, my dearest. I hope when you grow up and planning to be a mom yourself you must first prepare for what lies ahead. It is not easy and things can go out of hand. You can lose more than you are planning to but in the end it is all worth it. Seeing you grow up so beautifully reminds me that I made the right choice. You are the right choice my darling. I love you so much and I hope you will always love me too. And of course, your dad. :)

 Sincerely,

 Your Mom